Reflecting On My Life Through My Daughter
Hi Ladies & Gents,
It's technically late at night as I write this post and I can’t help but get emotional, maybe it’s because I'm pregnant and hormonal. Regardless of the fact, my daughter is turning two in a couple weeks and we are celebrating this Sunday at our home and as I prepare I can’t help but to reflect on my life.
I'm sure we all say it to ourselves "where has the time gone?" It's as if you blink and 5 years have passed you by and for myself it scares me a little. Sometimes I just want to freeze moments in time because I just don't want that moment to become a memory. I think this is the main reason I include my daughter in my blog, because it literally is a virtual journal of her life for me. I look at her sometimes and vision her at my age and I just start to cry with so many emotions and think how did my mom do it, for that matter how does she do it? My mother has three of us and I think how did she let go the day we went off to school, or the day I told her I wanted to do my own hair or pick my own clothes. I cringe at the thought of that day with Annabelle, I mean the day she started daycare I cried all the way to work. I do know I have plenty of time before major events, but boy does it seem that its going way to fast.
My daughter is a spitting imagine of me both physically and personality wise. She knows how to sucker daddy, like mommy and just knows what she wants. Sometimes she surprises me with how smart she can be, but I do have the fear like most moms that when my son comes along in 8 weeks that she will feel left behind and I know that I will do my best to make her not feel that way, but it still scares me. I want to be the best mom, like my mom was for my brothers and myself. I want my kids to be able to remember all the songs I sang to them and have the memories of "do you remember mommy use to do this with us?", because I surely remember it with my mom. My mom sang "My little Sunshine" to me as a child and to carry something like that on with my daughter is just so precious and gives me such a good feeling inside.
With that being said my wish for my daughter as she turns two is for her to enjoy life and look back at her childhood and say to herself "man my childhood was awesome." I feel that is my responsibility as her mom to make that a reality. Sometimes people say Lissette you are putting so much on your plate, you need to relax and what I say to them is that all of it is worth it for me because that smile, hugs and thank you mommies are well worth the exhaustion and headaches. I have plenty of friends that are not parents and I just tell them you will get it when you have your own. So for those of you that follow my blog and don’t have children, I hope one day you are lucky enough to have your own, because it’s pretty darn awesome and I thank God every day that he picked me to be the mom to such a cool kid.
Peace & Love,